It's been quite a Sabbath-cycle in pop culture land, as the world of celebretards met in a head-on collision with some surreal political doings. We hope you've been as entertained as we have by the last seven days of shenanigans, but in case you're a Chicago Cubs fan and have spent the past 48 hours buried in a pile of your own tears (sorry, low blow, but I'm a bitter Mets loyalist), here are the top 5 things NCDSUV took out of the week in mass culture that was:
Not to be confused with the reigning (and forever) champion in this particular category, the Verne Troyer fornication opus, the rumored fuck vid from the coffers of Britney Spears and her chin-hair-impaired paparazzo penis-pumper Adnan Ghalib is apparently not so. So much not so that Ghalib is suing the tabloids (holy irony alert).
Too bad. I mean, who wouldn't want to watch his sub-lower-lip racing stripe straddle Britney's post-partum vagina while she grabbed his Depp-gel-covered mohawk with one hand and held onto her wig with the other? Apparently not even its chief participant.
As we reported, well, a few hours ago, other people had reported to have solid refutations from the Josh Hartnett camp regarding a recent Daily Mirror's story, which alleged he boinked someone in a hotel library and it was caught on tape.
Finally, a reputable outlet, the BBC News, has confirmed that the "actor" is suing the Mirror for defamation, and in true pissant celeb-royalty style, demanding an apology.
Looks like we'll still have to cling to our copies of the recently released director's cut of Verne Troyer's porno after all.
There were rumors, via London's always reputable Daily Mirror, that the Hart-throb couldn't wait to even get to his hotel room, nevermind stick it out for 40 days and 40 nights. According to the story, he and some lucky lass shacked up in the library of the establishment (what kind of hotel has a library, anyway?), and it was caught on surveillance.
This is one NCDSUV feature not destined for recurring status. I think we've more or less hit the nadir (or zenith, depending on how you view it) on this particular topic. But alas, the Verne Troyer sex tape all of us hovered over with our cursors countless times, daring ourselves to watch, is now available in full (or as full a vertically challenged man's sexual wealth can get) for $9.95 at this website.
Now, we're not ones to tell you how to spend your money, or your one lifetime pass at watching midget porn without feeling like a weirdo, but with holiday season and subsequent budget-crunching fast-approaching, may we suggest you instead spend your hard earned 10-spot on one of these?