Chuck Palahniuk Sucks
Posted at 3:12 PM Dec 04, 2008
By Andy BeckermanWhy must we be punished for our love? What crimes are these? The world rejects the blissful critic and instead demands biomechanical contraptions dripping acid-like acrimony. As it is our duty to kvetch instead of kvell, we are forced by the stinky dick of Fate herself to dwell on the dreary, to pull up a loose floorboard and find beneath it a withered mappa mundi detailing shitty celebs and cultural albatrosses, or even to create our own, cartographers of pestilent and venal art.
And thus Chuck. Charles. Chester. Chuck. Palahniuk. A sin, no soul. Pah-lah-nee-yuck: three plus one segments that trip down the tongue; a torpid, fat and uncouth gent, spilling down a stairwell, laid out splayed at the foot, neck snapped. A prose style so sterile, its reproductive parts are dust. Barren of ideas, as of competence, for Chuck, words fill a quota, bereft of all craft and grace, simply soldiers taking orders. Well, welcome to Nuremburg.
