Kelly Osbourne's Super Mature Engagement

Posted at 2:06 PM Nov 19, 2008

By Kenny Herzog

OK, here's a new contest for all you loyal NCDSUV passengers: Feel free to guestimate how long Kelly Osbourne's engagement/marriage to 18-year-old lip-piercing-lover Luke Worrall will last and e-mail them to nudecelebritydeathsuv@gmail.com (or leave them on the comments board below). Whoever winds up closest to when their would-be nuptials inevitably get called off will be awarded with the opportunity to write a guest post about Ozzy's perpetually misguided kin. (Come to think of it, this could dovetail quite nicely with a Death Pool revolving around her scraggly, Satanic pop.)

You'll have to pardon my skepticism, and perhaps I'm operating under a bit of naivete about how certain private announcements are made public these days (People magazine covers, right?), but doesn't the long-term sustenance of a union seem a bit doomed when the pair's adolescent half declares it official via Facebook?