Will Give Food For Chris Williams, AKA Krazee-Eyez Killa, To Have Work

Posted at 12:30 PM Sep 23, 2008

By Kenny Herzog

Imagine if you were a successful trader (or whatever the terminology is) at Lehman Bros. and, after losing your job, found work as a teller at a local Chase branch. Embarrassing, but at least there's a dose of anonymity to it.

Now picture your equivalent as an actor. You have a couple of breakthrough supporting roles in the odd film or sitcom, only to have trouble landing your next big part, and so you take a few gigs doing less-than-glamorous TV spots for national chains─that are seen by millions of people.

Well, I am here to plead for one such man to be lifted out of his casting funk by benevolent Hollywood talent scouts. Because not since seeing Wet Hot American Summer nerd-deluxe Kevin Sussman in a subsequent Verizon ad have I felt such sympathy for a struggling actor. And the man I now speak of goes by the popularized moniker Krazee-Eyez Killa, known better to his friends and relatives as Chris Williams (actually, he's probably better known to them as the brother of his vastly more successful and attractive sister Vanessa).

In a two-year span, the one-time Dodgeball co-star has appeared in cringeworthy commercials for KFC, State Farm Insurance and, most recently, Southwest Airlines.

This, despite creating and co-writing one of the finest single-episode characters in the several-season history of what's arguably cable TV's funniest contemporary program. A character who looked Larry David straight ahead with his wonky eye and asked him if he "likes to eat pussy" and turned the phrase, "Motherfucker, what the fuck?!" into household slang. Or at least in dysfunctional households.

It's like watching Eddie Murphy beg on the street for rent money after doing Buckwheat on SNL.

Chris, I will not rest until your comedic genius is recognized by someone other than a nefarious ad agency. And you will always have a home here on NCDSUV (which is code for saying send us an e-mail and we'd love to post an extensive interview with you on the site).

Now where's Delicious?